Maybe it’s the rum or the sun or the fresh food or the cool breeze or the sleep I’m finally getting, but I’ve been a little bit melancholy on what should have been an awesomely happy trip. There’s been a day or two when I just needed some gentle reassurance that I’m okay and that I can actually have fun if I want to, but I feel like I’ve hit a wall in a bunch of ways and I can’t…
(Original title – The Duelling Club) Today is an anniversary of sorts. Today, one year ago, was when I discovered the weirdness on my breast and made a doctor’s appointment. Today is the anniversary of a small and insignificant event that has completely changed my life. If someone had told me that the worst part of cancer was the fatigue back when I was diagnosed 345 days ago, I would have laughed at them. I would have said no, it…
(Original title – Gilderoy Lockhart) Do you know what really grinds my gears? Watching TV shows and movies about cancer, where people have perfectly smooth bald heads because “chemo”, and they keep all of their eyelashes which are coated in layers of mascara and super long and beautiful, and the most perfect eyebrows to frame their faces. It really gives me the shits. They also get away with not being bloated from medication, without looking completely dead in the eyes,…
(Original title – Through The Trapdoor) Oh my goodness, I never thought this day would come. I don’t have to have chemo anymore, and I am thrilled. The plan was, if the liver spot was shrinking – one more chemo. If it hadn’t, then no more chemo. Today I started my day at 7am with my alarm going off just after I filled in my sleep diary, because that’s a thing I do now. I got dressed, having procrastinated too…
(Original title – The Forbidden Forest) Do you know the thing that sucks the most about all this cancer bullshit, more than the whole “I’m actually going to die” part? (Yes, actually, legitimately more than that.) The thing that sucks the most is that chemo can cause your digestion to slow right down. Why does this suck the most? Because I want to eat all the food, and I can’t. Why? Because my stomach is constantly full to bursting. It…
(Original title – The Midnight Duel) In recognition of my final chemo session coming up at the start of February, I thought I’d dedicate some time to demystifying what it is for someone receiving intravenous chemo like I have been. For the two days prior to having chemo, I have to up my liquid intake to 2 – 3 litres a day. I assume this makes it easier to stick you with needles, and maybe also helps you to feel…